Jealousy

“You know me,” Joe replies, oblivious to the exchange of glances between Haven and me.

I almost prefer it that way because it would be very awkward to explain, especially with Matilda right there, looking at me as though she’s won a game I didn’t even know we were playing.

Joe knows I’m interested in buying Haven’s father’s company, but not what’s happened between us. At least, not from my side. I want to believe Haven hasn’t told him anything. Judging by how they greeted each other, it’s possible they haven’t even seen each other since his friend arrived in town.

“Hi, Joe,” Matilda says with the same smile she was already wearing, then walks over to hug him. “Mom’s going to be upset when she finds out you’re here and didn’t come see her.”

“Mom?” I blurt out, unintentionally, looking back and forth between them in confusion and surprise at what she just said.

“She’s my little sister. A nuisance I have to put up with every time I visit.

” While Joe explains this to me, I start to notice the resemblance between them.

I probably would have figured it out on my own if I hadn’t been so fixated on Haven’s stares.

“I went to see her this afternoon, smartass, but you weren’t there. ”

“I had work, Joe,” she defends herself. “Some of us don’t get vacations. Haven and I spent the afternoon alone at the factory, picking the new designs we’ll be presenting. We were very busy working side by side. Luckily, we work so well together we almost finished.”

She looks at him with a loving smile he seems to ignore.

And I know she said all of that for my benefit, to make it clear that Haven belongs to her—or she thinks he does—but I pretend not to take the bait.

I came here to have a fun evening with Joe, not to argue with his sister over who has more claim to Haven.

“Shall we go inside?” I propose to Joe, practically pulling him along because Haven’s gaze is making me nervous. “I don’t want it to get too late—I have to be up early tomorrow. As your sister said, not all of us are on vacation.”

I hear her huff quietly, but I ignore her again and focus my attention on my companion, who opens the door once more and lets me go in first. I need him to make me laugh the way he does every time we’ve crossed paths and to help me forget the stress that Haven and Matilda’s couple act is causing me.

What promised to be a great evening has just turned into something I wish would end as soon as possible.

“We could all sit together.” The moment Joe opens his mouth and drops that gem, the world crumbles beneath my feet.

I don’t want to have dinner with Haven. I don’t want to have dinner with Matilda.

And right now, I don’t think I want to have dinner with Joe either, for suggesting a double date. “It’ll be fun.”

His smile says it all. Now I know why Haven didn’t push harder when I told him I had plans. With only one restaurant in town, it was easy to figure out where I’d be tonight. And although I want to think he didn’t invite Matilda on purpose, I can’t completely rule it out.

“Would you excuse me for a moment?”

I need a minute alone to keep from screaming in frustration, and I practically run to the bathroom where I lock myself in, just in case. I still remember what happened the day I arrived in town. The day everything started to get complicated without my knowing it.

I moisten my face, trying not to smudge the little makeup I’ve put on, and look at myself in the mirror. I let the air leave my lungs slowly. I fill them again until it hurts and then empty them a second time. When I manage to relax, I speak to my reflection:

“Don’t think you’re the center of the universe, Debra.

Haven could have invited Matilda to dinner for a thousand reasons that have nothing to do with you.

To make up for an afternoon of work, for old times’ sake, or because he felt like it.

After all, they’re friends. Not everything Haven does revolves around you, you egocentric idiot, so relax and try to enjoy the evening. ”

I fix my hair, straighten my clothes, and open the door to rejoin the others but run right into Matilda, who studies me from head to toe so brazenly that I feel an overwhelming urge to say something rude just so she’ll look me in the eye.

But I let her have her fill of scrutinizing me because I have nothing to be ashamed of.

“I suppose it’s the novelty factor,” she says in a condescending tone. “You don’t look like much.”

“Excuse me?” I can’t believe what I’ve just heard.

“Don’t think Haven is serious about you, sweetie.” She meets my eyes now. “You’re nothing but a pastime. The novelty in a town where everyone knows everyone. Once the infatuation wears off, he’ll come back to me. I’m the constant in his life and you… you’re just passing through.”

“First of all, whatever is between Haven and me is none of your business, sweetie.” I use the same pet name she called me, but loaded with irony. “And secondly, I wouldn’t be so thrilled about always being the second course.”

“Haven is mine,” she declares, grabbing my arm when I try to get past her and back to the table. “Don’t you dare get in my way. I didn’t stay in this shithole of a town for nothing.”

“If you threw away the opportunity of a lifetime over a man,” I say, staring straight into her eyes, “don’t blame me.

I came here to do a job and I’ll leave when it’s done.

If Haven isn’t with you, it’s not because of me—it’s because he’s not the slightest bit interested in you.

Open your eyes and stop degrading yourself, Matilda. Have a little more self-respect.”

“It won’t work,” she snaps when I’ve taken a few steps away.

“What?” I look at her, puzzled.

“Using my brother to make him jealous,” she explains. “It won’t work.”

“I suppose that’s what you would do.”

“Don’t play innocent with me.”

“I’m not in the mood for this, but I’ll say it anyway so we’re clear.

I didn’t come with your brother to make Haven jealous.

In fact, I didn’t even know they were friends until we ran into each other out there a minute ago.

Your brother invited me to dinner and I accepted because he’s very funny and I enjoy talking to him.

” Now I’m the one looking her up and down before continuing. “Nothing like you, it would seem.”

I turn my back on her and return to the table. Both men stand at the same time when they see me coming and I smile in thanks. I sit in the empty chair beside Joe, directly across from Haven.

“My friend here was giving me grief for not telling him sooner that I was in town,” Joe tells me. “He’s usually the first to know, but… let’s say this time my mind was elsewhere.”

He looks at me in a way that makes it clear he’s talking about me, but I just smile to avoid adding more tension to a dinner that promises everything except fun.

And yet, against all odds, once Matilda returns and we’re served, we maintain a pleasant conversation in which Joe and Haven regale me with stories from their youth and have me laughing through most of the meal.

For a moment, I even manage to forget the murderous looks Matilda keeps shooting me and Haven’s frown every time I laugh at one of his friend’s jokes.

“Tell me, Joe.” Haven looks at him while he speaks. “How’s everything going in the city?”

“As incredible as always.” He points at him with his fork before continuing. “You should come with me, Haven. You’re wasting your talent here.”

“I like the town.” He shrugs. I’ve started to get to know him a little and I know that’s not entirely true.

“So do I, but only for a few days. If you gave the city a chance, I promise you wouldn’t regret it. You’d grow professionally and you’d be thrilled with the endless possibilities it offers.” He points at me now. “Ask Debra if you don’t believe me. She can tell you just as well as I can.”

“Leave me out of your arguments,” I warn after swallowing the bite I’d just taken.

“Come on!” Joe encourages me. “I’m trying to make something of him—don’t make it harder.”

“Let’s see,” I pretend to think. “In the city you have everything at your fingertips. I’m not just talking about hundreds of career opportunities, but cultural and social ones too.

And if you know where to look, you can even find incredible, quirky places you’ll never have in a town lost between mountains.

The city gives you the chance to grow, not just as a professional but as a person.

Small towns are great for disconnecting from the routine and strengthening family ties, but they limit you too much in other areas.

If you want to go far, it’s clear you have to move to the city. ”

“Wow,” they both say at the same time, amazed by my passionate speech, though I don’t really think I said anything that merits that reaction.

“The city is overrated.” Matilda seems annoyed with me, though that’s nothing new. “It doesn’t offer nearly as much as you say.”

“Says the one who turned down a contract with one of the most prestigious fashion firms in the country.” Joe sounds bitter. “And all to stay in a crappy little town because of a—”

“It’s my life,” she cuts him off, “and I’ll do what I want with it. I like living here. Why can’t you and Grandma understand and respect that?”

“Because the reason you like it is the wrong one and you know it—you just refuse to admit it, Mattie. I’ve never in my life seen a more stubborn woman. Or a more blind one.”

“Shut up, Joe,” she scolds. “If it were up to you, Mom and Grandma would be left all alone.”

“Don’t give me that, little sister, because you’re not here for them. How long has it been since you’ve spoken to Grandma?”

“Who wants dessert?” Haven says, trying to cut the siblings’ argument short. “The chocolate cake here is delicious.”

“I’ve lost my appetite.” Matilda sets her napkin on the table and stands. “I think I’ll head home. See you tomorrow, Haven.”